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Parenting the Christian way.

How should we love and discipline our children?

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Parents are required to love their children with the aim not just of preparing them for this life but of guiding them towards eternal life. Genuine love is not that of indulgence but of instruction and correction. God is love and we are to emulate the way he deals with us in dealing with our children. All scripture is given by inspiration of God to guide us in every aspect of our lives and parenting is no exception. All who believe the gospel and are baptised into Christ become children of God and will experience and value both the instruction of scripture and the correction of God in adversity in their lives. The problem is that as parents we are learning at the same time as we are parenting and don’t always get it right. Below is a sample of scriptures which speak of parenting.

What we should teach our children.

1 Chronicles 28:9 "As for you, my son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve Him with a loyal heart and with a willing mind; for the LORD searches all hearts and understands all the intent of the thoughts. If you seek Him, He will be found by you; but if you forsake Him, He will cast you off forever.

Psalm 34:11 Come, you children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the LORD. 12 Who is the man who desires life, And loves many days, that he may see good? 13 Keep your tongue from evil, And your lips from speaking deceit. 14 Depart from evil and do good; Seek peace and pursue it. 15 The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous, And His ears are open to their cry.

Proverbs 3:11 My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor detest His correction; 12 For whom the LORD loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.

Proverbs 4:1 Hear, my children, the instruction of a father, And give attention to know understanding; 2 For I give you good doctrine: Do not forsake my law. 3 When I was my father’s son, Tender and the only one in the sight of my mother, 4 He also taught me, and said to me: "Let your heart retain my words; Keep my commands, and live. 5 Get wisdom! Get understanding! Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth. 6 Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you; Love her, and she will keep you. 7 Wisdom is the principal thing; Therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding. 8 Exalt her, and she will promote you; She will bring you honor, when you embrace her. 9 She will place on your head an ornament of grace; A crown of glory she will deliver to you." 10 Hear, my son, and receive my sayings, And the years of your life will be many. 11 I have taught you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths. 12 When you walk, your steps will not be hindered, And when you run, you will not stumble. 13 Take firm hold of instruction, do not let go; Keep her, for she is your life.

How we should teach our children.

Proverbs 13:24 He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly.

Proverbs 19:18 Chasten your son while there is hope, And do not set your heart on his destruction.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, And (if he takes it to heart) when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:15 Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him.

Proverbs 23:13 Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. 14 You shall beat him with a rod, And deliver his soul from hell (the grave).15 The rod and rebuke give wisdom, But a child left to himself brings shame to his mother... 17 Correct your son, and he will give you rest; Yes, he will give delight to your soul.

Ephesians 6:4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

1 Thessalonians 2:11 as you know how we exhorted, and comforted, and charged every one of you, as a father does his own children,

Hebrews 12:5 And you have forgotten the exhortation which speaks to you as to sons: "My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; 6 For whom the LORD loves He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives." 7 If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? 8 But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. 9 Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. 11 Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

Correction born of love is always tempered with mercy.

Jeremiah 9:24 But let him who glories glory in this, That he understands and knows Me, That I am the LORD, exercising lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness in the earth. For in these I delight," says the LORD.

James 2:13 For judgment is without mercy to the one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment.

Ephesians 2:4 But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us,

James 5:11 Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord—that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful.

1 John 4:8 He who does not love does not know God, for God is love. 9 In this the love of God was manifested toward us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him. 10 In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

Our aim should be that they might attain to the kingdom of God.

Luke 18:16 But Jesus called them to Him and said, "Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God.

I hope this helps.

Glenn Smith

 
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